Workplace description

A friend described her place of work as "perfectionism meets suppressed estrogen rage".

Getting older

As Jim got older, he switched from Johnny Walker to Johnny Wheelchair.

Books I haven't gotten around to writing

Epistemology For Dummies

The Entomologist's Cookbook

Hagiography For Fun And Profit

Chicken Soup For The Atheist's Soul

Headlines you don't see

Mother Of 3 Arraigned In Slaying Of Drifter